Saturday, April 22, 2006


My secret favorite section of the literary mag The Sun is the "contributors" page. When The Sun arrives in the mail, I soak in the cover photograph and then I turn the cover. I read ever tiny bio, absorbing the details of the artists’ lives. For example, about Michael Chitwood: "The wisteria that he transplanted from his grandmother's yard has bloomed only once since he's had it - in the spring following her death five years ago." Or Krista Bremer, who "lulls their two children to sleep by singing old Arabic folk songs." After I read an article, story, or poem, such as “The First Noble Truth” by Steve Kowit, I go back and read the bio. By the way, his teaching guide is in its twelfth printing and his most recent poetry collection is The Dumbbell Nebula. Why is this my favorite section?

Now I have my own contributors, and they are you.

When “My heart is an egg” came into my head, I buzzed over to a piece of paper and jotted it down, and then I thought, “hmmm, wonder what would happen if I put this on the blog.” Yet in my heart of hearts I must secretly have expected to read “this is the stupidest thing I ever read” or “get a grip.”

Instead, there is a wonderful coterie of comments that are affirming, insightful, and just downright fun to read. Vince, thank you for commenting: I think your egg is a beautiful metaphor for the openness to experience so necessary for growth. And how it flows in your veins, why you must write. Theresa points me to the “creation myth.”

I like how a previous entry, “In the event of fire” became a blog topic for Erin and Vicky, as if we’re making some kind of connection.

You are the favorite part of my blog. Let’s party, my place, two weeks from now. I’m leaving for a conference shortly, will be forced to explore the Finger Lakes region for a few days, and will come back rejuvenated with a clear mind and heart. Or so I hope. I am on the brink of…something. I'll be off-line for a while. Please bring party hats and balloons.

Friday, April 14, 2006

My Olympia, My Studio

Tonight I start my firstborn on my Olympia. This is the manual typewriter Theresa gave to me. I think, as I recall, that she said I had to give her my first born;-) Well, let me tell you, it is just starting out to be very, very good.

When was the last time you typed on a manual? The typing is hard and rhythmic, like drumming and you are doing the dance. It is intimate and personal. I love it.

I promised I would let you know some of the quotes I wanted to write on the walls of my writing studio a la the art gallery I visited this past summer on my road trip. Too many quotes, too little space: would you care to vote on your favorites, or offer something of your own?

Only put off until tomorrow what you are willing to die having left undone. – Picasso

Art does not reproduce the visible; rather, it makes visible. –Paul Klee

Art washes away from the soul the dust of everyday life. – Picasso

Art is a collaboration between God and the artist, and the less the artist does the better. – Andre Gide

Everything you can imagine is real. – Picasso

I am always doing that which I cannot do, in order that I may learn how to do it. – Picasso

Live your questions now, and perhaps even without knowing it, you will live along some distant day into your answers. – Rilke

My art has allowed me to bare my soul. – Edvard Munch

Art enable us to find ourselves and lose ourselves at the same time. – Thomas Merton

Have no fear of perfection, you’ll never reach it. – Savador Dali

I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free. – Michelangelo

My favorite piece of music is the one we hear all the time if we are quiet. – John Cage

The fairest thing we can experience is the mysterious. It is the fundamental emotion which stands at the cradle of true art and true science. –Albert Einstein

I think my personal favorite might be the Michaelangelo. What think you?

Sunday, April 09, 2006

My heart is an egg

Instead of a heart, I was given an egg. Every time I bump up against something, the shell cracks, and yolk spills into my veins. (Maybe on some days I look slightly jaundiced.) I used to think it was the nature of what I bumped against--what was outside of me-- but now I don't think so. It's just me. My egg is in my basket, and now I know I need to carry myself gently.

Saturday, April 08, 2006

How to spend the rest of your life

This week an acquaintance asked me in an email to take a moment and tell how I would spend the rest of my life. Aside from wanting to say oh, you know, the usual, engender world peace and end humger forever, it was just an email, and I didn’t know this person well, so I said something like the following:

I have an immediate desire to throw my jeans in the car and take off for a month out west, stopping at the Badlands, Little Bighorn, traveling down the coast of CA, see the big redwoods, stop in New Mexico and see the pueblos. This would be a non-destination destination trip, meaning I could stop whenever and wherever I want. There would not be camping :-) I'd like to see the Kentucky Derby, the winter Olympics, and walk on the Great Wall of China. I hear Edinburgh and Salzburg are not to be missed. I have a great photo of Mont St Michel, but that was over 20 years ago.

Ok, so how I'd like to spend the rest of my life, in a nutshell: I want to cultivate a state of mind that is happy, unafraid, fully present, free, open and so on. Learning is my passion... I want to make a great discovery. Please don't ask me to define that! Also, don't tell anyone! It's a secret. Also: enhance, increase, and enjoy much of what I already have: loving family and friends (maybe a significant other or soul mate, maybe not, who knows? I lost my crystal ball), health, fitness, doing something new every day. I love doing new things and going new places. I will not, however, try bungee jumping. I would like to move into freelancing full time. All of the above items are inter-related. But I do have one last one...I'd like to live by the water. Still, if that doesn't happen, I don't have any regrets.

Those of you who read my blog know what I really want is to achieve a state of grace. But in the meanwhile....I want to thank you for the sharing wine and lasagna and dessert, and this time I’d like to do a Monterey steak rub (never done it!! suggestions welcome!) with Merlot. I have a vision of friends coming over for dinner and having a good time ... tell me, in a nutshell, how you’d like to spend the rest of your life.

Saturday, April 01, 2006

What is...

This week I wake up with the following question:
what is my responsibility to share the wisdom and learning I have with
I try to dismiss this question: it assumes I have some wisdom and learning! Tee Hee! How funny, how arrogant! But still, when I take the chalkboard eraser and try to wipe it out, it keeps reappearing, like the birthday candle that won't be blown out and keeps relighting. What do you think about this question? So many questions, so few answers! Please, can you come over tonight for salad and lasagna and to discuss?